Getting Lit Without The Hangover
Holiday Party season in the corporate world is no joke. The 2015 season was no exception. With about three weeks left in 2015, I was on my way to falling one flight short of making Southwest A-List. So as any smart consultant would do, I added a stop to my final client site trip. Where to? VEGAS.
My partner in crime—let’s call him Rambo—was all in. Our final trip was looking pretty damn lit. 3 nights. 2 holiday parties. 1 night in Vegas.
We did the damn thing. Three nights of epic pre-games. A holiday party at Levis Stadium. Endless booze and food. And multiple mornings attempting to work hungover.
Those were epic times. No regrets whatsoever. But I soon came to learn, weeks like those can only do so much. The fun from those nights doesn’t extend much further than a few hours. I began seeking a more sustainable source of fun.
Back in the day when I used Snapchat!
Five years later, I’ve found a sustainable source of fun, available while working. I’ve discovered how to get lit, without the hangover. And no, this doesn’t entail ripping a shot of Jack at 9am. The cocktail is called: freedom and fulfillment.
What does freedom and fulfillment even mean though? Well, that’s an entire article in itself. Plus, it looks different for everyone. That said, I’ll share my working definitions, as these are states of being I’m continuously learning about.
To me, freedom is being at peace in the present. Freedom is choosing work aligned to my values. It's not doing work only because it pays well. Freedom is closing my laptop and going for a run at 3pm. Freedom is not being worried about “looking” online or available via IM. Freedom is not having the Sunday Scaries. Freedom is LOVING Mondays.
To me, fulfillment is being at peace in reflection. Fulfillment is a close cousin of freedom. It’s the “Hell yeah. That was an epic piece of work we did.” Fulfillment is service-oriented work—work that fulfills a moral obligation. It’s knowing that my work is positively impacting someone's life. Fulfillment is not lying to myself saying: “Yeah, I’m so happy to be helping [insert large enterprise] sell more software. This is cool work.”
How do we even begin to think about creating lasting freedom and fulfillment in our lives though?
The path to lasting freedom and fulfillment begins by tasting it. Once we taste how damn good it is, the craving for more of it drives us. The science of a craving presented by James Clear, author of the best-selling book Atomic Habits, supports this idea. Clear explains that dopamine is released not only when you experience pleasure, but also when you anticipate it. This anticipation is what we also know as desire. Desire is the engine that drives behavior.
Another way I see this is: if you know what’s at the end of the journey, you’re more likely to go after it. I’ve identified a specific set of means that can help us on this journey: education, productivity, and careers. I’ve used education to discover what it is that frees and fulfills me. I’ve used productivity to help me make more time for that. And I’m now building a career that makes freedom and fulfillment regulars in my life. I want to emphasize this point: education, productivity and careers are means to a life of freedom and fulfillment. While I love these topics individually, collectively is how I’ve seen them make the biggest impact in my life. Consider this article somewhat of an intro piece, as these are topics I’ll write about regularly. I’ll dive into how these topics have served me as powerful means to creating a life of freedom and fulfillment. Let’s get after it!
Education → Educere: To Lead or Draw Out
It sounds foolish, but in some ways I can say that I learned more about myself in 5 years than I did in 17 years of formal education. I spent 3-4 of those post-college years deep in exploration and discovery. When we get to productivity and careers, we’ll talk about how we engineer more of what we love into our day-to-day life. But the prerequisite to that is first discovering what it is we want to do more of. So we’ll start by defining education.
Source: Google Images
Education is derived from multiple latin words. My favorite of those is “educere,” which means to lead out, or draw out. Education is my umbrella for K-12 schooling, personal development, and learning. In each of these we are drawing out more from within ourselves. Or as the root word “educare” states, we are nourishing. Nourishing our mind, body and soul. Further, the root word “educatum” implies service. A key aspect which I think personal development misses on. When we look at these root words collectively, we can start to view education as a life-long process.
Working with a coach was pivotal in shaping who I am and where I am today. I believe investing in a coach of any kind is the best form of education. I stand by that with deep certainty after having spent tens of thousands of dollars on books, courses, and workshops. I can whole-heartedly say that my first coach, Stefano Ganddini, massively impacted the direction of my life. I first worked with Stefano in late 2016. I was two years into my consulting career, stuck in the same role for over a year, fed up, and ready for a change. I’ll never forget the moment when Stefano guided me towards founding WeElevate. We were going through a list of potential business ideas. On it I had things like work as a music manager and build a construction business. Two things which I attempted previously and failed miserably at. At the bottom of that list an idea read: “youth basketball travel program.” Stefano asked, “What about this? Seems interesting. Tell me more.” I hesitated and said, “Yeah, I did something like that back in college. It was fun, but don’t think I can build a career out of it.” After some back and forth. He convinced me to pick it up again. And as they say, the rest is history. Within six weeks, I got my business off the ground and began working with a group of 12 students. It lit me up in a way that nothing ever had. I tasted fulfillment. I craved more of it. I was still working a demanding, full-time job. So the next question became, how do I make this FIT into my life?
Productivity as a means to what end?
I believe this is the single most important question to answer when exploring how to improve personal productivity. Productivity became a fun game for me once I discovered what it got me. Moving through my 9-5 work faster, meant more time to work on my business.
Before elaborating on my view of productivity, I must admit that I resisted making this a primary writing topic. At times it can imply scarcity. It can imply that we are not doing enough as we currently are. But that’s not the view we’re going to roll with. We’re going to view productivity as a practice of being abundant. I geek out on productivity because it offers me the opportunity to make more time for what I love.
My definition of productivity can be summed up into the following: the modern day knowledge worker’s way of working. I am a knowledge worker. And if you’re reading this article you likely are too. A knowledge worker thinks for a living. We typically don’t create much in the physical world. We use, manage and create information. I consider ‘way of working,’ well, what it sounds like. This includes things like how I organize my to-do list, how I plan my weeks/months and how I actually create content. Think of “way of working” as workflow.
Viewing my life as a series of projects is by far my biggest productivity breakthrough. I learned this concept through Tiago Forte’s Building a Second Brain course. The course taught me how to create an intricate productivity system using OneNote to capture, organize and share all my projects and ideas. Prior to the course, I would make shitty to-do lists that were never completed. I would write down tons of ideas but I could never find them when I needed them. Now, I feel invincible. I’m able to finish everything I start. I know exactly how to capture and organize anything insightful I come across. I have a productivity system that creates a deep sense of peace in me. This is a preview of the learnings I’ll share with you.
Mastering my approach to work and how I work has been critical to cultivating freedom and fulfillment in my life. I’ve grown passionate about productivity because it is a key means to doing more of what I love. So what comes after discovering what we love (education), and optimizing our life to do more of that (productivity)? Making that love a regular part of our life by building a career around it.
Career Engineering
A career is the most important means to a life of freedom and fulfillment. You’ve probably heard some variation of this statistic, but a typical career will take up anywhere between 20-60% of your meaningful adult time (meaningful being time not spent sleeping, eating and childhood). So it’s safe to say what we choose to do for a living is rather important. In the ideal world, we graduate college and up in the perfect job doing something we love. Unfortunately, that wasn’t the case for me. Which is why I’ve given birth to the term Career Engineering. It’s a practice of chipping away at creating a life and career that we love. Engineering is defined as: skillfully or artfully arrange for (an event or situation) to occur. Career Engineering is finding big and small ways to engineer more of what we love into our career and life.
Source: How to Pick a Career (That Actually Fits You) by waitbutwhy.com. Great read I highly recommend!
A big example of this is taking a sabbatical at the old age of 26. I was eager to work on my business more, but I wasn’t quite ready to quit and go full time with it. So I artfully arranged a more low-risk option. A small example of this is building the habit of waking up three hours ahead of “clocking-in” to my 9-5 to work on my business. In both scenarios, I engineered more of what I wanted into my life. These bits and pieces of what I love serve me as fuel. Fuel to continue my pursuit of creating a career of freedom and fulfillment.
I consider a career that provides me with constant freedom and fulfillment the ultimate goal. I want to make a living -- and an impact -- doing what I love. Career Engineering is a vehicle to that. It offers us an opportunity to test different ways of making a living. It’s a low-risk, interim solution to a sustainable long-term career that we love.
To successfully engineer more of what we love into our life, we need to crush it at work. I love millennials drive for more fulfilling work. But, sometimes we are divas and are way too quick to make requests that benefit us. We need to build career capital (career capital is leverage you build up with skills and experience). Work is really our playing field. It’s where we’ll use education and productivity tools to make shit real. I refuse to only write about fluffy, abstract concepts that are not practical. That stuff will be around, but I plan to cover real work scenarios, like requesting a part-time role or having a training on something you love covered by your job. We’re going to have lots of fun talking about Career Engineering!
I don’t have all the answers. And I’m okay with that!
I believe in all the lessons and learnings I plan to share. It’s fire that has changed my life and I’m confident it can positively impact yours. That said, a theme of my writing will be honesty and transparency. I don’t have it all figured out. I don’t have all the answers. There are still days where I get pissed off at work. There are still days where I want to quit and go full time on my business again. But overall, I feel amazing and stoked on life more often then angry and frustrated at life. Holiday parties and happy hours paired with one-night Vegas trips were no doubt fun times. That was all part of my journey to now. And I love where I’m at now.
I feel an obligation to share what has worked for me and how I find a way to feel pretty damn good most of the time. While I’ve only accomplished a tiny fraction of what I want to with my life, there’s no reason I can’t share what has worked to date. I believe we need more people on the internet that we can relate to. There’s plenty to learn from successful business owners, best-selling authors and people with thousands of email subscribers. But sometimes they just feel too distant from where I’m at in my journey. So let’s learn together, right where we’re at. Freedom and fulfillment are right around the corner. Let’s go get it, baby!
Thanks for reading! Did you dig it? If so, subscribe to my newsletter, Frankie Fire Friday, to receive similar content.